Once you go black

I had two dates this week! The first one was with a guy whose hair was even redder than mine. Two pale people sitting in a bar… I met him at a super cute cafe. Lately I haven’t been so excited about dates anymore since I always wind up with guys that are nervous and find myself having to work hard to make them feel at ease. I’m tired of these type of dates. I like my men assertive. It seems like they are equal to fairy dust.

Anyway, the redhead was calm and easy to talk to, though he was nervous. He kept touching his face. We had a coffee with apple pie, switched to wine and got along just fine. His job isn’t super interesting, but he’s spent some time abroad as well. He keeps ordering drinks and while I’m not bored, my mind wanders off to the fact I still have to take a train home and I already know I’m not super interested in seeing him again, so I kinda want to get home. Once we call it a night, he actually pays the whole tab. That hasn’t happened in a while. Only two days later he sends me his phone number through a Tinder message, and I give him mine. He still hasn’t texted, so I’d be happy to accept we were just being polite.

Then I had a Tinder date last night. I was not excited about that one either, and even considered canceling a few hours before. He had come across a little needy, a few lame jokes… the works. But I went through with it. Happy I did! He was already at the bar when I arrived, and was better looking than I had been afraid of. His smile was fantastic, very boyish. We did a small pubcrawl, ran into a few colleagues of mine, which was too quick a meeting to be awkward, and when his last train home time was coming up I suggested he stay with me.

We went back to my place, had another wine for show and quickly moved to the bedroom. After we hurriedly undressed and he shoved his dick in my mouth it became very clear very quickly that the ‘once you go black’ saying was definitely true for this one. The man was huge. I’ve never seen a thicker dick. Foreplay was minimal, which I didn’t mind as his skills needed improving, and at that point I just wanted to get fucked. And did he. He was rough, hair pulling, choking and all. Good stuff. After a thirty minute break, he was ready to go at it again. He was going at it so hard I had to tell him twice I needed a minute. Also, because he took a super long time coming, and eventually didn’t. Guess the break wasn’t long enough.

After a bad night’s sleep, he was clingy which I only like if I’m into someone, we had another quickie. After a shower, I kind of ended it quite abruptly. It was clear we didn’t have much else to talk about. He was being super nice and I could tell he cared, but I am just not a happy chirpy person in the morning. If I like someone I want them to stay but if not, I get super awkward. He was a nice guy, and if he calls I’d go out with him again but if not, I’d be cool with that too.

A Dating Milestone

I received my very first unsolicited dickpic today! I was talking to a guy online, and we had only exchanged a few messages trying to set up a date, when all of a sudden he writes: ‘how about tomorrow?’ and BOOM! Dickpic. And it’s not even a good picture! Why the hell would you send me a picture of a half flaccid, floppy, poorly shaven, the head halfway out of your foreskin cock? Yuck. And the he acted all surprised that I did not feel like going on a date anymore. But I would not regret it? This guy is way too desperate. And really, I want a good fuck, but not that bad.

I wrote about John last month. There is no way around it anymore; dude’s looking hot. So, with a little help from my friend I bit the bullet and sent him a message. At the end of last year he had sent me a message on Facebook saying that my yogastudio is in the street he lives in, and considering our little India chat a few weeks ago, I figured that’d be my open door. So I sent him a note saying that I’d be around a lot that coming week if he ever fancied a beer. And guess what happened? Nothing! It has been weeks, and he has sent me back silence. And so I felt a little awkward going into work and did a good job avoiding him. Until I was tired of it last week. Fuck that shit, if he is awkward, he should have thought about that before sticking it in.

So when I saw him in the restaurant, trying to ignore me, I purposely bumped into him, gave him a little nudge and asked how he was. He gave me a sheepish smile, a ‘yeah, yeah, good.’ and off he went. I laughed. He had a little bit of a breather when I was out this past week, but of course, I ran into him today. As I entered our on-site store, he was just exiting. He stopped me on the stairs, and asked how my vacation was. Vacation? Yeah this trip to Scandinavia he saw. When I told him that wasn’t vacation but work, he kind of joked around and said that that’s what we all say. So what the hell is up with this guy? My money is on ‘he’s a pussy’, but it frustrates the crap out of me.

So Scandinavian men? Hot! Big, tall, masculine, I like it. Maybe I should find myself a handsome Viking, a chalet in the snow and a husky dog, and I’ll be all set.

Then just now, I received a message from the boring American I went on a date with last weekend. He’s back from his trip to Mexico. Great. I’d hoped he’d forget about me so I didn’t have to tell him thanks but no thanks. This one doesn’t get a second chance.