The Big No

Last night, Sebastien, the French guy came over again. It had taken a while after our first ‘date’, he’d ย been working late nights and I had caught the flu. Add to that a few last minute cancellations on the days we did try, and it’s two weeks later.

In those two weeks however, we’ve been in touch quite a bit. Now I’m not much for sexting or Skyping and stuff, but he sure is. What would start off as innocent ‘what time do you get off work?’ texts quickly evolved into ‘I’m into anal these days, how do you feel about that?’ Uh… well now. One; I have only met you once. Two; I might be, but would never tell you just yet. Three; what is the deal with anal these days? I seem to be missing a trend here. Anyway, one night on Skype chat he states the obvious; he’s horny, how about I send him some pictures? That was also the night I was sick, which I had told him. I tell him no. There is no way in hell I am photographing myself buck naked to send to a guy. The internet is a dangerous place. He seemed to accept it, but only minutes later asked for it again. Dude, read my words. I am sick. Are you seriously expecting me to strip down, put on sexy stuff and start clicking away? I don’t think so. Do I want to go on video chat then? Hell. No. Oy… The real thing is so much better.

So finally, last night was the night. I finally felt better (he was terrified of catching anything as he can’t afford to be sick work wise) and he didn’t have to work too late. He came with wine and his good looking self. During the day I hadn’t really been into it, but as he had been talking about what he wanted to do to me, I was reminded when I saw him. We barely finished one glass of wine before he started taking off my clothes. He was eager, and before I knew it, I was fully naked on my couch. I have met few men who knew what they were doing with their tongue down there, and he wasn’t one of them. Shame, but it was enjoyable nonetheless.ย The one thing I love is that he’s an ass man. I love a bit of attention down there, and he definitely wasn’t shy about it. He puts my leg behind my head and fucks me, and I finally get him off by hand as he wants to come on my breasts.

We sit around and talk for a bit afterwards, have another glass of wine, and I’m thinking I wouldn’t mind if he went home. I’m hungry, and want to sit around for a bit before going to sleep because I have an early morning. So when he asks if I would scream at him if he took off, I shake my head. But then he sees my Buddha Air picture and enthusiastically starts telling me about airplanes. Half an hour later he’s gone, and I clean the room up a bit.

He’s a nice guy, though I think he’s one of those that would bore me to death over dinner, even though we have stuff to talk about. He texts when he says he will, hasn’t shown up empty handed, and he’s honest. Even calling him a friend with benefits would be too much, as we just have a mutual agreement to fuck when convenient.

I feel like this post is a bit all over the place this time, which is my state of mind today! It’ll be better next time, promised.

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16 thoughts on “The Big No

  1. I just wrote an entire bit about dick pics and touched on “online spank buddies” that seem more interested in Skyping and exchanging pics than the real thing. It’s very perplexing to me. I can’t figure out if it’s a “natural” progression that happened as technology advanced during the years I was married, or whether it’s a weird thing. Either way, I seem similarly confused – like there’s something I’m not understanding that a wealth of others seem quite enraptured with.

    • Me neither! Especially when they’ve gotten the real thing already, and know they will again in the very near future. I think it’s probably an age thing as well. He sent me my first dick pic ever, quite the milestone haha.

  2. Haha I almost choked on my morning tea when I read the anal comment… Hilarious. It’s a territory I have yet to conquer myself, but EVERYONE is talking about it these days. I find a lot of the time guys I’ve dated will talk about it jokingly, to gage my reaction. Apparently it can be quite an intimate experience if the person knows what they’re doing … Sadly, most guys think the “shocker” is how women like to approach ass play… I think not.

    • I hope you finished eating ๐Ÿ˜‰ It’s not new to me (I’ll have to write a post about it) but going about it on text is so wrong. Have the balls to have a conversation about it. I find that while most guys find it hot to talk about it, a lot of them actually back out when they realize the amount of work they’ll have to do for it, physically. Sometimes I like to tease them and say I’m into it, but on the giving end, and I have yet to find a faster way to scare them off. Good way to see if they’re as open minded as they think they are when asking that question!

  3. Ah, the anal topic….my Mr 10K man I think would have been definitely interested in that, but having had an operation “up there” in January and being advised by the consultant in February that “all is healing welll there as long as you don’t do anything stupid!” I decided that I would stop the conversation before it happened. It does seem to be the “norm” though sadly from looking at a lot of free porn available on the net…

    • Yeah I really wonder why it’s so hot and happening right now. I suspect that a lot of men haven’t even tried it and are just dying to find out if it matches up to what they see on Youporn if you ask me! I also think there’s a huge difference between doing it with someone being in a committed relationship with or ‘occasionally have sex’ with. And don’t bring it up by text after 2 sex dates ๐Ÿ˜‰
      I hope you’re recovering well!

      • I think that you are right…I think that most “porn” online is far from representative of actually what is sexy and enjoyable for both men and women! And I think it’s definitely something to do with someone that you know reasonably well rather than as a one off! I am recovering well, but I don’t think poking around in there just yet is a wise idea – especially when there are plenty of other things that can be played with and poked first!

  4. Yeah – what’s the big deal about the poop chute? I mean, really – if your cock is big enough to hit my g-spot and satisfy me vaginally then it’s too big to be in my ass. My “Young Brad Pitt” gave me just the right amount of ass play this past weekend – fingers only, combined with mouth. My Mr. Right Now inquired about it after about 6 months (uh – too big! No way!) and I told him my standard answer “wow – that’s something that requires a lot of trust and a lot of tequila!” Then he said he’d never done it. Wow. Almost 47 years old and never had anal sex? Well then, absolutely COUNT ME OUT!!!

    • Ay that does not sound promising. Honestly for most men I think it’s simply the porn idea that comes with it. I have done it (once) before, and I’ll have to write a post about it looking at all the reactions, but it was ah-mazing. It was a total spur of the moment thing and kinda the opposite of what you describe (which is still very much true) but they don’t realize there’s a lot of ‘prepping’ involved that they’re expected to fulfill. I would do it again, but this time I would probably give it a lot more thought ๐Ÿ˜‰

  5. Hey Ella – been reading yoru blog from the start. I’m still early on and really like your writing style! Its casual and exciting. Kudos for that!

    As for the ass play – its a great thing imo. I was exposed to it once – and it was so fascinating and felt good. Since then I’ve been an avid fan of giving and receiving.

    Didn’t know anal was a thing going on in 2013 across the pond.

    I suppose you’re right in your assessment that men fancy it because of Porn. I’ve tried it once or twice with a partner and it felt about the same. Another couple of times I tried it and it didn’t pan out – never actually reached penetration. But I still haven’t been turned off by it and my curiosity is always there.

  6. Yes you should write about it.

    Its fascinating – I feel like its a much bigger thing in Europe and west of the big pond. Maybe its less taboo there? I wonder what it is.

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